Rocío

I thought about what Liam told me. Rocío... not being mentally well...

"Think about it." He looked at me. "She's always in a bad mood..."

"Yes, yes, is that all?"

"No, no... she also barely takes care of herself. She smokes, she's the one who smokes in the bathroom."

"Really?" That didn't surprise me, either... "But maybe for her that doesn't necessarily mean neglecting herself..."

"Also, she reacts strongly when someone touches her..."

I looked at him in surprise. I didn't remember that, was there something Liam didn't tell me?

"You see, I told you about how difficult it is to get Rocío's attention when she's working, right?" He began.

"Yeah..."

"Well, the first time I touched her shoulder, she almost hit me..."

"Why didn't you tell me this before?"

"I forgot..."

I slapped my forehead. Of course he forgot. He always forgets to tell me the most important things, right?

"Liam, we've been together for two years, and you still don't trust me? I understand, but it's just that..."

"No! No!" He exclaimed. "I swear, this time I really forgot..."

I remained silent. Believe him or not... the truth is, I wouldn't be surprised if, in reality, it was because he was afraid to tell me.

Maybe... He didn’t want me to hate Rocío even more?

It made me a little angry that he almost hit Li, but he was worried about her, and I wanted to see more of what he meant.

"Even though you told me before that Rocio was the one smoking in the bathroom, it was obvious. No one else smokes in the studio. Besides Grace... of course." I kept thinking about how Rocio corrupted her. Grace didn't smoke before she met her. In fact, she was against it.

"So you finally decided to let go of the thought that Rocio never leaves the studio..."

"HEY! THAT WAS A JOKE!" I lied. I genuinely thought she didn't leave the studio for a moment, but then I remembered Liam telling me she went out to smoke...

"Yeah, yeah, whatever helps you sleep, Clarise." He patted me on the back.

"Shut up."

"Yeah, yeah, back to the topic..." Liam was silent for a few seconds. "...You and I both know that reaction isn't normal, right?"

"Yeah...along with everything else, and the fact that she's never in a good mood...what could be affecting her?" I started to think.

"Parents' comments would come first."

I remembered. The parents' comments... They were never good toward her... and if they already affected Grace, I can’t imagine how they must affect Rocio, when the comments aren't directed at the games, but at her...

"But this doesn't excuse how she acts, okay?" I tried to remind Liam. He always tries to see the good in people, and ends up making the good justify how he was treated. I knew that, in Rocio's case, he would grasp onto the fact that she's probably very stressed and use it to justify how she treated him, and how she treats others.

"I know, but it could influence how she treats others... remember that, please?"

"Yes. I'll remember it... But remember, it doesn't justify how she treated you and the others."

"Yes... well..."

We were silent for a long moment.

"Is there... any way we could help her?" Liam began.

"Look, we're not close to Rocío. And it's really hard to even get close to her. So there's not much we can do..."

"...You're right," Liam looked at the floor.

"But I could try to observe her more. See what's up." And Liam suddenly looked at me with a look of tremendous hope.

"Okay, go ahead," he smiled.

We cleared the dishes and then went to sleep in our shared bed.

The next day, we spent the morning playing video games or watching whatever. After all, Grace was rich, and what she paid us was enough for us to eat and more.

In the afternoon, at five, we finished getting ready and started heading to work, while Liam talked about how he hated the manga "My Little Sister Can't Be My Girlfriend" and how it was an aberration to humanity.

Today, aside from that awkward conversation, the walk to work is silent. Considering Liam's concern, I don't want to end up saying something and making him mad at me. But if I'm honest, I don't regret speaking shit of her. No matter how bad the stuff she’s going through is, she needs to hear these simple words:

Your mental state doesn't justify your actions.

I understand her, I really do, but I hate how she treats everyone... I wouldn't treat people like that.

And suddenly, Liam pointed to the side.

"Hey, isn't that Rocio?" he said, pointing at a girl with fading black hair in a worn black jacket.

I looked and yep, definitely, but... she looked worse than I remembered... maybe I just haven't really looked at her in a long time, yeah it must be that because I really never look at her for fear that she'll notice and fires me or something. (This is a joke, I really just didn't want to see that asshole face of hers.)

So, we went and followed her until we caught up with her. I wanted to start a conversation with her. See exactly what she's like through small talk.

Rocío tried to avoid us. I noticed, she started walking faster, and she turned up the volume.

to the music in her headphones. But that's not enough to stop me. There wasn't a single person I couldn't chat with; I talk to EVERYONE. Even people like her, I guess...

So I went and stood next to her.

"Hello!" I began. There was no way she was going to ignore me when I was already right next to her.

Rocío took out her headphones, looking at me with that typical disgusted expression:

"Hello..." she greeted in a low voice. A shy one, huh? Or maybe she just doesn't want to talk. But no one escapes my attempts at conversation.

"How are you?"

"Fine..."

"I'm glad to hear that!" I smiled at her fakely. "So, do you always come here? We don't usually see you when we come."

"Yes, yes, it's just that I usually come earlier. Today I couldn't leave until five..."

"Oh, the same time we left. So? What happened that we left late today?”

Rocío stopped looking at me:

"Umm...things...I had...something to fix."

"If you don't want to tell me, just say it, okay? I don't bite."

"No! It's okay, I just had to fix...some things." The most common excuse I've ever heard.

"Hmhm...and tell me, why isn't Grace with you? Has she arrived already?"

"Yes, yes, she's already arrived. It was just me."

"Sure, I understand. And you girls study the same thing, right?"

"Yes...the same. Computer Science..."

"How's it going?" And she shuddered, that was a sign: things weren't going well for her.

"Uh...it's...fine, I guess."

"That's great!" I decided to let her be happy and let her believe I believed her.

We continued walking, while I thought about what to say or how to continue the conversation with someone who obviously didn't want to talk to me. Maybe she just isn't a woman of many words...

"So... Do you live nearby?"

"Not really. I have to take a bus, but college is close to the studio, so I get here quickly..." She wasn't looking at me anymore, but I noticed the annoyance in her voice. She already wanted me to shut up.

"Oh, of course. And do you live in a house or an apartment?" Rocío looked at me.

"Do I look like I could buy a house?"

"Okay, okay, calm down, I was just asking. Maybe you're renting a house, you know..."

"Stop pretending you want to talk to me," she said frankly. "I'm not stupid."

"Hey! Hey! I just wanted to start a conversation so we wouldn't be left in an awkward silence." Rocío stopped walking.

"Do you think I don't know?"

"...Huh?" I was confused.

"Yesterday you were blabbing away, oh yeah, Lacey's is going to fall, and it'll all be MY FAULT!" She suddenly started yelling. "YOU WANT ME OUT OF THE STUDIO! YOU JUST WANT TO SEE ME FALL!"

I froze.

Did she hear that?

But it doesn't make sense, she was already there when we arrived, she couldn't have heard us...

"Y...YOU JUST WANT GRACE TO FIRE ME!"

"But you're the co-creator, she can't fire you..." But he cut me off.

"SHUT UP!" She yelled, getting the attention of everyone there. "I'M GOING TO FIRE YOU, I SHOULD FIRE YOU!" And then Rocio ran away.

...

“...I told you it wasn't a good idea to complain about Rocío on the way…”

“...Is she going to fire me?”

“I don't think Grace will let her. In fact, you're part of the family, she won't let you get fired. Grace doesn't let Rocío do whatever she wants, and you know it.”

“...You're right.”

We stood there, staring at each other.

“...So she heard me…”

“Yep…”

“...But it wasn't a reason to start yelling, God. Doesn't she know how to solve things by talking?”

“Maybe not” he replied.” Maybe nobody ever tried just talking to her, so she doesn't know how to solve things by talking…”

I looked at Liam. He was right. But...no, no, he was right.

I sighed. This day at the studio was going to be tremendous...

Then we continued walking until we reached the studio. Liam stood at the door, like the "guard" he is. I continued walking to my seat, which was relatively close to where Grace was sitting. And the first thing I heard: an argument between her and Rocio.

"GRACE, DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND!" Rocio exclaimed. "SHE WANTS..."

"ROCIO, SHUT UP NOW!" Grace shouted. "Stop asking me to fire people, and stop firing people! Are you sure it's Clarise who wants to see Lacey's fall and NOT YOU? With so many layoffs, we're going to lose employees and we won't be able to continue the games!"

"We were perfectly fine without them!"

"AND WE WOULD BE PERFECTLY FINE WITHOUT YOU!" Grace yelled.

Rocio remained silent and left silently.

....

....

DID I CAUSE THIS?

Grace went to her seat, and I couldn't help but stare at Rocio, still a little worried. This time, Grace really went too far. And of course, no one but me heard because Grace didn't speak that loudly, and the others were far away, almost isolated from us.

I don't understand why Grace chose me to be near her, maybe because she usually vents to me...

But this time, she didn't come; she went straight to work, which left me staring at a certain someone: Rocio.

Her face went from full of anger to completely blank. There wasn't a single expression on that face, but her gaze, her eyes, seemed lost, as if they were on a different planet, on another plane. I swore I saw tears.

And the truth is, Grace really went too far. Me too, but at least I didn't say it to her face...

And suddenly, speaking of the devil, Grace sat down next to me.

"Ugh... I can't stand this anymore, Clarise. I can't stand ROCÍO anymore."

"Huh? What happened?" I asked. "I mean, I heard part of it, but what really happened?"

"Well, she wanted to fire someone again, just because that someone offended her. And on top of that, one of our best workers. Ugh... she's so arrogant because she's the boss... and she thinks she can step on me..."

"It was me, wasn't it?"

"Huh?"

"She wanted to fire me, right?"

"Oh, you..." Grace then alluded. "You think you're so great, don't you?"

"No, it's just that I got into an argument with Rocio on the way there because she heard me complaining about her the other time."

"Oh."

"...Yeah...uh...well."

"What did you do?" Grace asked.

"I was just trying to talk to her, have a conversation, and all of a sudden she started yelling at me because I, uh..." I stuttered a little. "Maybe...I said Lacey's would be better off without her there?"

Grace sighed.

"Just so you know, our college is around..." And she mentioned an address that was...VERY close to our place. "Besides, Rocio's starting to stay until late all the time."

"Hm? Why?"

"You know, she gets into fights a lot. This girl doesn't know how to stay calm, I swear I can't stand her anymore."

 Maybe nobody ever tried just talking to her, so she doesn't know how to solve things by talking…”

Rocío had serious problems.

Grace's chatter was just another sound for a moment, while Clarise thought about what a huge problem Rocio must be in. But she forced herself to come back to reality; she didn't want to offend Grace like that by not listening to her.

"And you know what? She has a serious clinginess problem. I feel like she just wants to push everyone away so she can be closer to me. I know, terrifying. She's a fucking stalker. I work with a stalker."

I couldn't help but hate her a little for that. Pushing everyone away from Grace? What the fuck is wrong with her? Seriously, she was crazy. But also, a part of me felt sorry. Was she so desperate that she had to push everyone away from Grace to feel loved?

"Wow... that's... terrifying."

"Yes! See?" Grace sighed. "On top of that, new complaints have come in..."

"About what?" I asked.

"It's ridiculous! Alleged jump scares and scary things in the games! Ha! Why would that be in games for little girls?"

"Well, that's ridiculous," I retorted.

"Yes, yes, it really is ridiculous. But you know what's not ridiculous? That they want to take us to court for it."

"WHAT?!"

"YES! TO COURT! IT'S TOTALLY RIDICULOUS!" She exclaimed. "On top of that, it's probably not true!"

"But then it's serious. Have you... tried to see what they're talking about? Have you checked the games? Maybe they've been hacked."

"Yeah sure. We have Liam to take care of that! In my mind, I thought, ‘Oh my God.’ “Speaking of Liam, what's he doing at the door so much?”

"You don't know?!"

"Nope?"

"Rocio said she'd be in charge of moderating the page too, and she sent Liam to be some kind of weird guard."

...

...

...

...

...

Silence.

...

...

...

Grace looked at me with a face that could only be described as disappointment.

"ROCIO!" she called after her. "COME HERE!"

Rocio stood up and walked slowly toward Grace.

"What do you want now?!"

"Come on, we need to talk." Grace grabbed her and led her outside. Rocio had no choice but to follow, but she looked at me with a face...not the typical disgust.

She was mad.

VERY mad at me.

But anyway, I just did the right thing! I told Grace about the job change she'd given Liam. It's her problem. If she didn't tell her, she should have; they're coworkers, after all.

But I couldn't help but wonder: What's wrong with her? What's happening to her to make her behave like this?

And now, I'm curious about what Grace is telling Rocio, what's going on outside, but I'm not that nosy, so I just stay put.

So I got to work. I have a job as an artist, so basically I have to imitate Rocio's style as much as I can. Seriously. I've seen what happened to the one who tried to do something new. Anyway, I don't have that much work today either, since Rocio took it all for herself. I wonder why she's doing that. Is she that much of a perfectionist?

So I drew and drew for a few hours, until I heard Grace and Rocio return. Wow, that conversation was a long one.

I looked at Rocio; she seemed worse than before. She seemed more... distracted? But at the same time, she was obviously sad.

"Ugh... I can't stand her, I can't stand her." Grace sighed and sat next to me.

"What happened now?" I asked.

"Do I have to tell you...?" She looked at me.

"No! No! You don't have to tell me if you don't want to!"

"Anyway, I'll tell you that Rocio is a pain in the ass."

"Okay, okay, let's calm down a bit, shall we? Weren't you friends?"

"Yes, we are friends outside the studio, but this one thinks we can continue this friendship even inside the studio. Not here. Here we are coworkers."

“But you use me as a therapist even at work…”

“Yes, yes, but it's different with you.”

"Really? What's the difference?"

"You're not so attached to me, you calm me down, do you understand?"

"...And...didn't you try to talk to Rocio about not clinging to you so much? That you have other friends? In fact, does Rocio have other friends?"

"Nope, she only has me." Grace smiled for some strange reason.

"Well, no wonder she's so attached to you, Grace. Did you try to talk to her about it?"

"Yes, but she just gets offended! No wonder she doesn't have any friends!"

"But how did you tell her?"

"Well, in a nice way! It's HER problem if she takes it the wrong way!"

"Well, I guess you're right there..." Clarise sighed.

"And you know what terrifies me?" Grace suddenly mentioned.

"What?" I asked.

"Rocío's the one who does most of the work, so if there really are disturbing parts, she'd be the one doing them..." She spoke. "And you know the worst part? I wouldn’t be surprised. She's becoming very... secretive. There's no way to ask her or make her let me see what she's doing...And also, have you seen her old works before this one? They’re all so….horribly disturbing. She has a history of making horror stuff"

“Really?” I looked at Grace, worried. She was right. Rocio grabbing ALL the work was strange, added to the parents' complaints...

I have to do something.

"Your time to go is getting closer, sorry, I barely let you work." Grace started helping me pack up my things.

"No, no, don't worry. I'll always be there for you, no matter where we are." And I thought: she should be too, for Rocio. Maybe if I set an example, she'll realize. Although I really don't know why she's not always there with Rocio.

"Well, bye, see you, Clarise, thank you very much!"

"You're welcome, Grace." I grabbed my things and left, thinking about everything Grace had told me.

I thought, a history of making horror stuff, strong reactions to small stuff, barely takes care of herself.

What is Rocío hiding?